Sunday, December 16, 2007

Beginning of 20s Crisis

Apratz is still alive, safe and sound! My deepest apology for being completely vanished in the blogsphere, If anyone cares by the way. Do you care? Do you?

Anyway, work is really overwhelming. Recently I was totally zombified by overloaded tasks. Well, it is not that job is redundant; it is me who did it super slow. I myself is an utter slowpoke *sobbing*. I wonder how long will it take to familiarize myself with this business.

Quite sometime, I feel like loosing senses in certain things. I become less sensitive to others, thus reluctant to spend more times to meet counterparts and friends during weekend. I worked wholeheartedly during weekdays, and when weekend comes, I feel like spending time for myself only, and not others. I will be sleeping throughout the whole day, watching anime and reading anything worth all by myself, which made me a sucker in social life,

I realize that I can’t let myself entirely buried by this routine. Working is my x-priority, yet it is my current obligation since I need to payback the Tuition Fee to the Government by working 3 years in here. There’re so many things I want to accomplish in this super short lifespan. That’s why I don’t want to see myself doing the same thing all over again in the next 10 years. Frankly speaking, girls has less responsibility compare to guys in terms of life contingency plan, so I should say, 3 years working is more than enough.

Hopefully I can get enough capital when that time comes; afterwards taking Postgraduate study will be my choice in order to support my life contingency plan. Then easier said than done, I will build up my own company in Indonesia to support community development as well as being a University Lecturer at the same time. Life is so perfect on the top of the paper, but still every second that just passed needs to be fighting for.

Now I sound like I am in the midst of 30s :(.

4 comments:

A.H. said...

welcome back!

yeaa... that's the kind of feeling that people usually have once they start blogging. i mean working. your mental energy are all being absorbed when you're in the office and you got home so drained, dont want to think about stuffs, just want to enjoy the evening and be entertained (aka watching animeh)

Anonymous said...

arigatou nii-san :D

even for now i am totally mortified by work. Guess i took the wrong path, but i personally think that i can't find any better than this :(. I am exhausted, leaving with no life everyday, thus encountering same happening again, until it becomes a vicious circle that i cannot runaway from. I wanna get a life, a better one, but i have no courage to make any manuevre, just yet for now :(

Maap jadi bocor

Anonymous said...

I am always lazy meeting friends, and I dont feel guilty not speending my money away with my friends at cafes, movie theatres, and bowling malls...

All can chat over phone with their friends, ok, i mean skype over phone...sms, msn, thru blogs...many things...quality counts i think =)

Merry Christmas girl!

Apret said...

@ yixin

Dearest my angel,
Merry Xmas for you :)
Thanks for coming down and comforting

Next time we shall go for a drink ^o^