Selamat Idul Fitri

1 Syawal 1429 H

Mohon Maaf Lahir dan Batin

~O' God, please give your mercy
~Coz i never skip reading yaoi-related materials even during Ramadhan
~But deep down inside, i am still very green and pure
~nevertheless i am dead sure that You will somehow understand...
~*sounds of thunderbolt*

The Diary of A Sociable Anti-Social cum Unemployed

Indo-NTU Alumni Gathering @ Marina Mandarin

Superbatch65 Girls

Flatmates^^

Amazed with the splendidly delicious foods by the first class chef ^^. Sadly, not many people that i knew coming.

Neechan's (supposedly) Farewell Party

The thick skinners

Went to a crazy Karaoke session with the bunch of shameless thick skinners. We knew no embarassment! There's no 'shame' word in our dictionary, never! *flip pages*

Movie Marathon in a row

Mamma Mia!

Wall E!

Kurosagi

Watched 4 movies in a week (okay, now i am in total broke) : Hana Yori Dango the movie, Kurosagi the Movie, Wall E and Mamma Mia. Each of them was splendid! Wall E makes me ponder about the future of this world; it's so deep and not to mention scary. Moral of the story : Let's save the world by eating no junk food and exercising, exercising and exercising!

Had a major crush on Yamapi after watching Kurosagi. Yamapi is the epitome of sex! Who can't resist the les miserables bishounen with mysterious aura and the painful past? Right now I am hunting for Kurosagi DVDs and any dorama with Yamapi inside will do!

Turned vivacious after watching Mamma Mia. The movie was so witty and fun to watch! There're a lot of Aunties in the theatre and they started to sing by the time the characters sing -_-". Since we are considered young enough and not really familiar with ABBA songs, we can only name few songs. But overall, the movie was good!

Yixian's Farewell Dinner

Halal Steamboat! coolness!

Tried the halal steamboat along Bugis (no idea where the exact place is). Food was very good, eating until Im ready to puke *grin*.

There're still a lot more... but i am lazy to scrunitize friends' Facebook just to steal the pics.

Moral of the story : Enjoy life to the fullest!

On the Job and Marriage Issue

And i won't wish you luck
Coz i don't think it's luck
I think you have what it takes
So if you get the job, it's not luck
It's you!
Luck found you the job
Anything else from there is your own capabilities

(Quote Yixian in sometime around August'08)

After 100 years waiting in solitude (??), finally they confirmed my placement at the #1 University in Singapore as Research Analyst. Why Research? Coz i am a Research-whore -_-.

Then i need to give up another position at my beloved University as an Assitant Manager -I am so sorry!

I hope everything goes well with the HR process and all, and can start working on the 2nd week of October. Gee, fasting month has shown its tremendeous blessing of virtue T_T. Thank goodness!

On the bad side, I'll be taking TOEFL this coming Sunday at 8.30 AM in Jakarta! WTF I'm still in Lala-land at that time, it's not funny to be overslept at such a critical time -though i always did it. This iBT is fairly different from the previous test, since they have Speaking and Writing section. Good thing is, I love to speak! Bad thing is, I often butcher the language in the writing test *sob sob*. And nervousness sure can kill! Hopefully i am able to accumulate abundance of self confidence by the time i take the test!

I am still screwed at my GMAT. And i can't really sit down and study at home as there will be myriad temptations whatsoever *sob sob*! The reason why i study so hard its because the fee is bloody expensive, and i won't make it a waste by getting mediocre score report *hurhur* though it is also impossible for me to get the astronomically high score -_-. I feel like doing Self Hypnosis to maximize my ability in the Verbal section T__T.

I'll be going back to Jakarta from 26 September - 4 October 2008, so whoever wants to meet up and fool around together let's kick off (nah this is what i called bloody temptation T_T).

Hari Raya is coming, then family gathering is in front of the eyes. I always feel inferior during family gathering especially when relatives touch on the issue of marriage and family building. I mean, sometimes they had a private chat with me, asking about my progress on that 'issue' -which made me speechless all the way. Well, I am still a normal girl, getting infatuated with Hyde or Yamapi and can't resist Japanese hearthrobs *grin*, but i think it's still a long time to go. I don't think at this point of time I am mature enough to share my life with somebody else 'til death - at least not now. Well, let's see how i can handle this and prepare the politically correct answer during the chat *lol*.

To everyone who are fasting, these are the last 10 days of the month, so don't waste it! :D

Apratz’ Top 20 (Recent) Random Facts

- I recently feel like crushing myself to the MRT train, jumping into the railway when the train is coming for the sake of curiosity
- I will then make myself conscious by reciting prayers afterwards (??)
- I am paranoid of blood-spilling (haemophobia?)
- I recently think of putting the corrupt government officials in the chamber of gas so that they’ll undergo a slow and painful death
- I am pretty morbid and sadistic at times
- But in fact, I am no fearless at all
- In 5 years time, I see myself as an academic researcher doing a PhD
- I am not good at giving up
- I often overreact toward everything, and make people annoyed afterwards
- I am an extreme headstrong, who won’t hesitate to pester others
- I think I am the most unromantic person in the world
- I think of Facebook and Friendster as a tool to boost up one’s pseudo self actualization
- I respect people because of intelligence above everything
- My mother said that I am the most insensitive person on earth, and I think that might be true
- I hate it when people being a busybody yet I feel like being one for most of the time
- I love Math and Science subject(s), but am suck at them
- If I strike Toto and win $100,000 the first thing I’d do is giving them for charity
- (yet I am never ever interested in trying Toto)
- I am no culinary adventurer and often end up eating the same thing over again
- I hate it when people show their poker face and fabricate their attitudes –I am a strong believer of ‘be-yourself’ slogan
- I wonder what initiates me to do this –because I think this is stupid -_-“

Emperor Lelouch Owns the World

My beloved Indonesians,

Justice the founder of my fabric mov'd:
To rear me was the task of power divine,
Supremest wisdom, and primeval love*

Abandon your choice for presidential election
No, forget the presidential election!
Indonesians won't be needing democrazy!
Indonesians will be needing dictatorship!

Let me be your one and all ruler
Let me be your Emperor
Emperor Lelouch thereby ordered you to be my slave!
HAIL ME!
HAIL ME!
~All hail Emperor Lelouch!~

-__-"

I wont be held captive because of treason, WILL I? *run*

Oh okay, i'll back to the cave, be a 'good' Hikikomori and resume my study.

(*Taken from Dante Aligheri's The Divine Comedy)

ANTI-SOCIAL FOR NOW

29th of August marked my last day being a corporate slave. Right now I am officially unemployed.

I need to re-think about everything to re-organize my life, therefore, i'll alienate myself for a shortwhile, being an anti-social, a Hikikomori for the next 1-2 weeks.

Anyway, i got a giant 'thank you' card from my colleagues in my last day. These was written in the envelope :

Dedicated To : A Dreamer, A Japanese Talker, An obsessed anime fan, and a True Human Being

Well, that's 'encouraging' in its own way ^^.

Regards,
Apret
Unemployed
In a search to become a true human being

WTF man, I'm a novel ESTJ?

Your Expression Number is 8

Driven and ambitious, you have the potential to reach great things. You're both good with money and good at getting things done quickly. You are an excellent leader and a great judge of character. Full of energy and confidence, you undertake projects that seem impossible. Dependable and determined, you are able to understand the bigger picture. Even if you are not in a position of power right now, it will fall to you. At times, you can be very materialistic - and obsessed with status and power. While this isn't always a bad thing, you sometimes take it to the extreme. In order to be truly happy, you must balance the material and spiritual in your life.

What's Your Expression Number?

I won't give a damn for fortune reading or numeric chasm whatsoever, but i was fairly shocked when i tried this. It suits my MBTI personality as an ESTJ!

I do believe that people can change -in fact people always change! When i was still in Uni -being a fail student-, my MBTI profile was somehow skewed to ESFJ (a compassionate, caregiver archetype) and depicting sympathetic, warm-hearted and loyal personality *vomit blood*.

As i stepped into a dreadful corporate world, i turn into a very sensible individual, with overt judgement towards something. I used to be very competitive and unsecured over something trivial. I am being quite aggressive and set too high standard of myself -which makes me emotionally drained and blames on myself afterwards. To be honest, i'm getting tired of this. I want my old self to resurrect!

I bought some books about self-help during Jakarta Book Fair about a month ago. The titles revolve around 'finding your success', 'getting back your old self', 'smart and smarter', 'Self Hypnosis', 'Finding your dream', 'Hell at Work' (oops!) et cetera, et cetera. I haven't had time to catch up with everything. I hope I can cover some after i take my bloody GMAT.

PANIC PANIC!!!

My flatmate and I are currently having GMAT-GRE fever. I once discussed with her about GRE vocabularies this afternoon during crazy GMAT-GRE drill in Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf Holland Village, and ended up mistakenly referring 'prodigy' as 'pedigree'.

And 'prodigal' as 'prodigy'

And 'officious' as 'spacious office' (dari Hongkong! iya gw tau!)

And 'abhorrent' as 'abhorrer'

T___________T

We are so stressed out until the waiter asked us to leave because the cafe didn't favor people studying and hogging the seat while so many costumers are coming. Bah!

I will be taking GMAT in 6 October 2008. It cost me a bomb so now im broke to the extreme. Total panic!! I hope my brain is usable by the time I have the test.

I AM AN ACUTE NARCISSIST !!!

I had a graduation photoshoot with my hi-school batch who just graduated this year! My Convocation gown has already covered by spider-net and few cockroaches because of the long awaiting! (nay im exaggerating :p).

Esplanade!! Argh hot hot never apply sun-screen lotion -_-"

Gullible 'Angel', heh heh heh XD

His special ability is : Gossiping and taking pics of himself, im just his casualty

'Asal-tapi-koq-jadinya-nyeni' pose

The girls

Im sure that one day if i become a granny, i'll show my grandson these pics ^o^ *corny!*

Anyway, i am looking forward to wear another Convocation gown in the next 2 years; in the different school, different style, different country with more advance 'title'...

I Need Luck! Aplenty of Luck!

I think every debater will bombard me with 'inconsistency' issue when i start blogging about this. But now i really need luck. Aplenty of them. Please cross your finger. I don't want to be penniless for the rest of the months while staying in a foreign country. I am ugly and fat, I've got no body to sell (wtf *lol*).

I have resigned from my current job. Affirmative. Yet i need to find another source of earnings in order to realize the 'next' step in my life. I once claimed that i intend to do academic research or community development (and no longer corporate), but in the past few days, i got chance to attend interviews for an investment banking company (and a public service company). Did i just say that i dont want to do corporate? Well, money is the root of all evil, and money did talk *evil grin*! There goes my consistency...

I know that the feeling of being jobless and penniless isn't really healthy. It'll eventually consume our positivity and self-esteem, especially when being in here, an (in)famous red dot lifeless land. Even thinking about the rise of inflation and the skyrocketing rent fee make me chocked, since the rate of inflation didn't justify with the rate of increment *lol*. Now i sound like i give up being a dreamer and turn into a loyal realist.

So now im crossing finger. I'm certain that He will always give the best (and therefore grant everything we want in just a matter of time).

Talking about positivity...

When im thinking back the old days, i have been bestowed upon countless of luck as well as 'lucky coincidence'. I used to be adventurous and unpredictable yet my carelessness level is Godlike! (Can you imagine, how frustrating the combination could be?) However, i tried to be positive at all times. I keep ensuring myself that everything will be fine, just chill up and enjoy everything even though as if we're standing motionless in the abyss of gehenna.

These are true story about positivity (and not stupidity!!!). Hope it inspires you (the positivity, not the stupidity coz im talking about positivity whatsoever!)

Giant Anchor embodied decisiveness! (actually pic is a bit unrelated -_-)

1) I have mistakenly booked my flight during my Mediterranean-Bohemian Euro trip. That time i was en-route from Thessaloniki, Greece on the way back to Copenhagen. I actually supposed to take connecting flight from Bratislava, Slovakia while i thought that i'll be taking flight from Vienna, Austria. And i just realized my mistake on the D-Day, 4 hours before departure! For God's sake, Slovakia and Austria are two different countries, and I am ALL alone with zero ability to speak in Slovakian or German. Let's say i can reach Bratislava sound and safely but there's still a big chance that i'll miss my flight. The horror images of 'The Hostel' haunted me by the time I reached Bratislava. Will I make it? WILL I? But fortune favors the bold! I am sure that I can make it! And then, yes, i can make it on time...

"I can make it!!" An Imbecile thinking about the future then suddenly haunted castle comes up (??)

2) Due to a mistake in flight booking again (this time it's my friend's), i need to spend 2 days ALL alone in Paris, France. I haven't booked any hostel while in the meantime people said that Paris is not that safe (and on the top of that, I can't speak French nor read map). So i decided to camp in Charles-de-Gaulle airport! My parents worried like mad, but hey this is the flame of youth! This is the essence of travelling! And in the end, equipped with amazingly dense-positivity i am still surviving without experiencing any pickpocket or whatsoever. Positive, positive and positive always!

Yes i dont want to leave this place but that doesnt mean that im okay with missing my flight T_T

3) On the way back to Singapore from Copenhagen, i ran to the wrong flight gate. Instead of running to British Airways -my actual flight, I bumped into Scandinavian Airlines and almost board the wrong flight and missed chances to go back to Singapore again. But then again, I kept telling myself that I will REACH Singapore for certain no matter what happens *the fire of youth starts igniting*. My actual flight was delayed so I can make it on time. Yes, it was a miracle, and i do believe that being positive is one of the key factor to reinforce it.

4) Et cetera et cetera.

I know that I cannot always effortlessly depend on luck and no others; but in fact i think i always do 'something' to reinforce that luck; I put extra effort like mad and pray like mad and being positive and confident like mad also. So here is the formula :

Luck = Effort + Prayer + Positivity

And it is absolute form of equation and cannot go on the way round! Thus you can't change that into this :

Luck - Positivity = Effort + Prayer

Or this :

Luck - Positivity - Prayer = Effort

Thats epic FAIL!!

After going through the dark tunnel, you'll encounter a very blue sky! ^o^

Hence, for you who already read this up to this point, i am not writing crap anymore. This is serious post even though the way i write is bimbotic (it has been always like that, I wonder). Let the luck emerges perpetually in our life, by doing non-stop effort, praying and being positive!